"Ritzy" West End Bistro

West End Bistro draws its personality from the Ritz Carlton, which sits adjacent to it on 22nd Street. Most of their patrons are corporate clientele or vacationers--exactly what you would expect from a psuedo-hotel bar. Singles, dressed to impress, congregate at their upscale bar. Meanwhile, couples generally occupy the dining floor, enjoying the delectable yet limited dinner menu. Large windows encircle the restaurant providing sufficient light, as well as the opportunity to observe passer-bys. There is not the pervasive feeling of confinement that accompanies so many hotel lounges.

The menu is mostly seafood, although they offer lamb, short ribs, and a sirloin burger for those craving red meat. The Grilled Flat Iron Steak was excellent, but the portion was small. For an appetizer, I recommend their oysters, which vary by season, but have been stellar on each of my visits. On one occasion we were given complementary caramelized popcorn as an appetizer. And while popcorn does not seem like an upscale starter, I assure you it is tastefully done and worth trying. Overall, culinary expert Eric Ripert, does an excellent job. I have never been dissatisfied.

There is usually a wait, so I suggest making a reservation. Even with a reservation I have found myself killing time at the bar while waiting to be seated. The staff is exceptionally cordial, and generally prompt. Additionally, the crowd is always lively, especially on the weekend, making West End Bistro a great place for a date, or a meeting spot with co-workers.

Smith Point – Where everyone is cooler than the next guy

My first two experiences at Smith Point didn’t happen. Why? I am not cool enough to be on the “list.” So you can imagine my sudden feeling of self worth when I was able to gain admittance. More intense was my curiosity surrounding what differentiates the Georgetown “in-crowd” from the marginal rabble that is my cohort. The answer is simple. My middle name is not Abernathy, and I do not have a Roman numeral following my last name.

Smith Point, as a venue, has so much potential. The exposed brick and candlelight creates a feeling of underground exclusivity. The music, a blend of classic 80’s and modern pop is an ideal dance mix. Even more convenient is the bar service, which is prompt. Smith Point has all of the necessary elements for a good time. My complaint is the general pervasiveness of narcissism and entitlement. The girls come in groups for the dancing. The guys compete for their attention with exposed bravado and an attitude of superiority. I am not accustomed to other guys commenting on my clothing, especially since I was dressed appropriately. Save it for the runway, slick.

It is the patrons that spoil the experience. You can be sure that your girlfriend will be looked up and down, like a piece of meat. And you can be sure, as a newcomer, to be judged. But don’t challenge them, because the response may likely be, “Do you know who my father is?” Toward the end of the night, the shadowy corners become impromptu hotel rooms, perhaps because no matter how nice “cool guy’s” residence may be, it is still his parent’s place.

Come to Smith Point, where you can consort with DC’s elite, or at least their children. But don’t let them sense weakness. Look them in the eye, and let them know that your trust fund is just as big, and that Daddy is right around the corner.

Vapiano - Casual Dining with a Twist

Vapiano’s has discovered a way to eliminate the uncomfortable debate of how to split the check at the end of the night. Each customer receives a “chip” card that is scanned after every purchase. At the end of the evening, patrons check out at the front and cover their tab.

The result is a casual atmosphere that is remarkably fluid, as customers can sit at one of the many dining tables or linger at the bar without having to worry about closing and re-opening their tabs. It makes for a great meeting spot for co-workers and friends because people can come and go as they please without having to hastle with "settling up" before leaving.

And while the transition from one area to another is effortless, Vapiano’s has done an excellent job of delineating specialized sections for its patrons. Customers can order in the buffet style line where the cook makes your dish while you wait. Or, if you don't want to separate from the bar while your meal is prepared, they will give you a buzzer card that vibrates when it is ready. Alongside the kitchen are dining tables, ideal for larger groups. If you want a more social experience, you can congregate around the brick fireplace and dine in the lounge area at the opposite section of the restaurant. After dinner, transition seamlessly to the adjacent bar and enjoy a nightcap.

The food is fresh and distinctively Italian as most of their entrees are either pizza or pasta. Vapiano’s lacks intimacy, and might not be the best place to have a conventional first date, but it facilitates group congregation. Don't lose your card as you will be charged $100, and don't forget to leave a tip! Located at M and 18th street, Vapiano’s has revolutionized the casual dining and drinking experience.

O'Connell's - Alexandria's Authentic Irish Pub

Everybody loves an Irish Pub, especially when it is authentic, and this is exactly what O’Connell’s offers --authenticity. The wait staff and bartenders are predominantly Irish, and the décor is charmingly antiquated. Their vintage bars are over two hundred years old and there is endless antique paraphernalia adorning the walls, such as a turn-of-the century cigarette dispenser usptairs. Even the cupboard that stores the liquor bottles was recovered from an old Irish pharmacy. These relics must have cost a small fortune, but they augment the old fashioned Irish atmosphere. Three wood burning fireplaces complement the dark mahogany and exposed brick prevalent throughout.

O’Connell’s is located on King Street two blocks from Old Town’s waterfront. The colonial brick exterior belies its dimensions. From the outside O’Connell’s appears to be quite cozy, but upon entering, you’ll find a labyrinth of bars, dining rooms, and corridors. It almost feels as though you are navigating through an ancient castle. There are four bars, situated throughout restaurant, interspersed among the dining rooms. The main dining rooms are located upstairs and connected by an open corridor that overlooks the bar below. On fair-weathered days you can eat outside on the sidewalk, or enjoy a few cocktails on the patio overlooking King Street.

I have not eaten at O’Connell’s but their dining area is always bustling. The menu looks a bit expensive for Irish Pub fare, but again, this is personally unsubstantiated. For a drinking venue, O’Connell’s is excellent. There is always a lively crowd, and with four bars it is never overly cramped and always convenient for throwing back a few Guinness pints while watching your favorite football team on the tele.

Town Hall -- Glover Park Convenience

So I found where everyone in Georgetown goes to pre-game for the Gin & Tonic late night dance scene, Town Hall. It too is located on Wisconsin Avenue, just a few blocks south. I am starting to realize what both of these establishments have in common, convenience.

Like Gin & Tonic, Town Hall doesn’t offer anything outlandish in terms of ambiance or theme; it is your general run-of-the-mill tavern. However, it is just far enough from Georgetown to avoid the weekend commotion, yet still accessible to young professionals who work in the city, many of whom live in Glover Park. On the weekends, it fills up to capacity, shortly after 10pm, and stays that way until close—providing for a lively atmosphere.

Town Hall is clean and organized, two important qualities that cater to its young professional patronage. Unlike Gin & Tonic, there is no dancing and drinks are easier to acquire, as it is far less crowded. If there was one episode last Saturday that illustrates the distinction between these two venues, it would be the group who ordered five Irish Coffee’s at the bar. This would never fly at Gin & Tonic. Not only would the bartenders be ill-equipped to handle such an order, but the chances of not spilling them are slim to none.

I have never eaten at Town Hall, but their menu is standard American cuisine. Dinner entrees like Dijon chicken, shrimp, and scallops go beyond your typical bar fare. This is a differentiating characteristic of Town Hall as it is more swanky than your typical pub. If you dine before 7pm during the week you will receive 15% off of your meal. And on Tuesdays they have half price wine night. But why settle for half price wine, when you can visit Bistro Lepic down the street for a free wine tasting?

As an outsider looking in, I have failed (until now) to grasp the appeal of the Glover Park social scene. But, like Gin & Tonic, Town Hall has something intangible for its visitors, convenience. They cater to the sizeable demographic that live in the area and who are actively searching for a central locale to meet up with friends. This is why they have a consistent following of regulars who visit time and again.

Café Milano – Where you have to pay to play

Located on Prospect Street, just west of Wisconsin Avenue, is the small but elegant Café Milano. It offers all that you would expect at an Italian café, good food, wine and friendly service. But what Café Milano really offers, is a chance to flaunt one’s social status, which is why it has become my second favorite DC establishment for people watching (the first is Kramerbooks Afterwords Café).

Café Milano markets itself to the “movers and shakers” of DC—businessmen, politicians, diplomats and of course, socialites. I have been there on two occasions, and on both, I would be lying if I said that I saw anyone of any considerable fame. But you sure wouldn’t know it judging from the designer suits, fashionable dresses, and air of self importance. It is a rare occasion (Halloween) that you can observe someone wearing sunglasses after dark, which certainly speaks to the heightened sense of self that abounds among the patrons of Café Milano. Fortunately for the perpetrator, the bar and dining room were well lit enough to reveal that they were, in fact, designer. And if the moon glasses didn’t tell the entire story, the designer three piece, cufflinks and all, did.

The bar is a scene from the Great Gatsby. There is an obvious dichotomy of company here. The women—young and attractive--have a manner about them that says, “I am not looking for just a husband, but a way of life.” The men, twenty years older on average, have a complementary look that declares, “I can provide that lifestyle. Do you see my suit?” There is nothing that would indicate their message to be false—they really ARE well dressed. I’ll leave the judgment regarding the marital success rate of such matches to the experts.

If you want to ingratiate yourself into this crowd, you are going to have to pay up. There is a premium to dine here. Entrees are in the forty dollar range, and you can get a small pizza for 17 bucks. A glass of wine will run you in the vicinity of fifteen dollars. If you are looking for food, walk south to Filomena’s, it is a better value. But if you are looking to people watch, for next season fashion ideas, or for a husband, come to Café Milano.

Buffalo Billiards - A Big Game Venue where you can breathe

There are many venues that cater to the archetypal sports fanatic. A host of bars boast plasma television screens, billiards tables, darts, and the expected array of bar food--all of which Buffalo Billiards has. But what separates Buffalo Billiards from its competitors is its size.

They comfortably fit 29 pool tables, five dartboards, a shuffleboard, 6 projection screen televeisions, and another 20 flatscreens. Comfortably. They also have ample places to sit down, from bar stools, to tables, to couches. It is an excellent venue for birthday's or other events as they have two secluded rooms for private parties. The Victorian Room is ideal for a smaller get-together, while the Adirondack Room accomodates larger groups. You can also call and reserve a television on the main floor for the game of your choice.

I have rarely been to Buffalo Billiards when it is crowded. The Floyd Mayweather--De La Hoya fight last year was as packed as I have seen it, but there was plenty of elbow room and it wasn't claustrophobic. The one complaint that I have is that there are only two bars. As expansive as it is, when there is a big game or fight, you often find yourself waiting to be served.

The demographic is relatively consistent as they have carved out a niche with undergrads and twenty-something professionals. Situated next to the Dupont Metro stop makes it extremely convenient and a good solution if heavy drinking is in your plans. Given its spaciousness Buffalo Billiards can host the big games in a more comfortable atmosphere than most bars. It may be the best suited venue in the city for the first two weekends of March Madness.

Clarendon Grill – Bring Your Hard Hat

The decorative scheme at Clarendon Grill is obvious. From the scaffolding on the ceiling to the embedded nails, hammers, nuts, and bolts at the bar, patrons are reminded that they are in a construction site. I understand what they were going for, I just can’t figure out why. Do young professionals secretly yearn to toil nine hour days in the piping heat, after which, they can crack open a few cold ones with their worker buddies? Is Clarendon Grill this fantasy realized?

Despite the odd choice of décor, Clarendon Grill is an ideal venue for entertainment. As you walk in, there is a lower level to the right where various bands set up. The floor is expansive enough to enable dancing and mingling without too much discomfort. Gonzo’s Nose, an 80’s and 90’s cover band, was playing on my last visit. They were extremely entertaining and managed to sound surprisingly like the original artists they mimic—from Duran Duran, to Everclear, to Gwen Stefani. The list is an extensive one. Fans can even visit their website to purchase the must-have of all fanatic attire, the Gonzo’s Nose women’s thong. I digress.

The Bar is set above the dance floor, and albeit by only a few feet, it offers a great perspective for not only watching the band, but for scrutinizing the often overly-intoxicated crowd on the dance floor. Perhaps the greatest feature of Clarendon Grill is the patio. It allows for a much needed escape to those whose ears are ringing, or to those with a nagging cigarette craving. When the weather is nice, the patio is a place to relax with friends--especially now, since they have used some of the construction paraphernalia inside to renovate it.

Clarendon Grill is comfortably expansive, thoroughly entertaining, and well worth the 7$ band cover. So bring your hard hat, and enjoy whatever weekend entertainment they have on tap.

Gin & Tonic - A Glover Park Frat Party

I have never actually been to Gin & Tonic during the day. I have never eaten a meal there. Nor have I ever knocked back a few beers while watching a sporting event. So the following review may indeed lack a well rounded perspective, because contrary to popular belief, Gin & Tonic offers all of the above.

There must be something that has brought me back to G&T five times since moving to the DC area. It's not the thirty minute line outside. It's not the 98.6 degree sweatshop that waits beyond its doors. And its not the opportunity to dance shoulder-to-shoulder with hundreds of undergrads and young professionals. So what can it be? Oh yeah. I forgot. I am, after all, a frat boy at heart. Because despite the overly crowded dance floor, the uncomfortable environs, and the sometimes excruciating wait for the bathroom, Gin & Tonic IS fun. Well, as long as you don't show up sober. Make no mistake. It is--on weekend nights--a frat party.

Like any crowded venue, you have to buy multiple drinks when you get to the bar, because competing with the slew of other patrons for bartender attention is impossible. But like all good frat parties, people come to party, and people come to dance. The atmosphere is only enhanced by their selection in music, which is all that was good in the 80's, as well as a few more recent pop hits. And if you get bored with the music, look no further than the movies playing on the elevated televisions, Animal House or Wedding Crashers--cult flicks that don't need to be audible to be enjoyed.

If I ever questioned the frat house theme, such doubt was recently eradicated when I learned Tucker Max hosted a private screening at G&T for the new movie based on his book, "I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell." I don't know Tucker.....but they serve it at Gin & Tonic.

On a side note.....don't read the book. And don't see the movie.

Tiffany Tavern - Live Bluegrass Differentiates this Old Town Pub

Tiffany Tavern --It has your staples of the average watering hole. They have beer and booze. The bar is old. The food is standard pub chow. But every Friday and Saturday night they have live Bluegrass, no cover charge, and it is worth checking out.

For five hours the relatively dark and dank setting transforms. The band plays at the front, visible and audible from King Street, beckoning in a crowd looking for entertainment and fun. It permeates the venue, from the front bar, to the dining area in back. Smiles abound among a diverse age demographic, ranging from twenty-somethings to retirees.

Spending Friday evening in Old Town Alexandria? You might want to drop by Tiffany Tavern.

Rocket Bar - A Weekday Basement Bar When You Need It

Nestled on the bustling streets of Chinatown, Rocket Bar offers an excellent venue to escape into a dark den of gamedom. You will find an eclectic mix of visitors, from the suit laden happy hour crowd, to the jersey wearing Caps Fanatics--all seeking to enjoy this gameroom enclave. Rocket Bar is home to 17 HDTV's for your viewing pleasure as well as 7 pool tables, shuffleboard tables, darts, and three bars. Rarely is it difficult to get a table and at $12/hr for two players it doesn't break the bank.

Bar service is quick and efficient and the crowd is cheerfully boisterous. Located across the street from the Verizon Center, this basement venue can get crowded before and after a big game, but is large enough to handle the sudden influx of sports fans. While other venues struggle to create an upbeat weekday atmosphere, Rocket Bar is generally hoppin'. But if you are looking for a glass of wine and some quiet conversation with an old friend, this might not be the venue for you.

Located on 7th Street between G and H Streets, Rocket Bar can offer an exciting reprieve from the mundane midweek doldrums.